In Another Life
by alwayslove12
Summary: Basically seasons 1 and 2 are the same, but Jax and Tara are married, and Abel is their son. Picks up at the begging of season 3.


AN: I don't own anything.

He was gone.

Her baby boy was gone. Taken by a man seeking vengeance for his own son's death. The amount of rage and hurt she was now feeling were enough to put multiple people in the ground. She understands now what immense pain the man must have been feeling, when he came into her home and took her son. However, she still can't understand why he would ever want another human being to feel the way she felt. The feelings that were coursing through her body were something she wouldn't even wish on her worst enemy. She felt completely numb. All the anger and the grief that had consumed her earlier were now void from her mind. Besides the pounding in her head, she felt nothing. Lying on the bed in the back of the clubhouse she stared at the ceiling. Closing her eyes to numb the pounding in her head, she struggles to block out the events from earlier this afternoon.

She had called Jax to warn him that Gemma was about to, or already had done something really stupid, and was nowhere to be found. She was half way through explaining exactly what happened, when he walked through the door. That Irishman she had patched up a couple weeks ago. He had the most distraught look on his face and a gun in his hand. When he reached forward to pull the phone away from her ear, she didn't fight him. He started talking about his son dying, and how it's only fair. An old lady for the death of his son. He points the gun at her, and everything begins to happen so fast. She tries not to let fear over take her, while he points the gun at her, but it's no use. She's just staring at the gun frozen in place, when Abel lets out cry diverting the Irishmen's attention. He walks over to Abel, as Sack and her watch him curiously. The next thing she knows is the Irishmen is holding her son while he grabs a knife off the counter. She tries to get to Abel when Sack jumps in front of her. Trying to protect her, while trying to save her baby. But it's useless as the Irishmen plunges the knife into Half Sack. He falls to the ground, as she slides down to lean against the leg of the kitchen table. She tries to move, to get to Abel, but fear, and something she didn't realize until later, stops her from moving. But then the Irishmen surprises her by putting Abel back in his carrier. Hope courses through her body. Hoping he realized killing her son, wouldn't bring his back. Then he turns to look at her again, and his eyes are empty. So empty she can't even to begin to gauge what he's thinking. He puts the knife back on the counter, but picks up the gun he brought in with him. He walks up to her, and she's not sure exactly what he's going to do, when he raises the hand with the gun, and then all there was, was black.

Struggling against the darkness, she hears someone talking in the distance. She can't make out what they're saying, but they sound frantic. Suddenly she feels someone's hands on her. Shaking her and trying to wake her from the darkness. Trying to push past the pounding in her head, and the darkness, she tries to open her eyes, but they feel so heavy.

Pushing past the haze, she slowly begins to open her eyes. Jax is kneeling beside her. Worry covering every inch of his beautiful face. She can see his lips moving, and she struggles to make out what he's saying.

"Jesus Christ Babe! Are you ok?" she winces slightly when his hand runs lightly over the spot where she was hit. His eyes search every part of her body looking for more injuries.

Was she ok? She thinks so. Other than the horrible pounding in her head. Her eyes leave his for second as she looks around. Wait, why was she in Abel's room. Wasn't she in the kitchen? Closing her eyes for moment she tries to figure out how she got there, and then she remembers.

"Abel." She whispers quietly to herself. She opens her eyes to look at Jax. "Abel." She says louder "He took Abel, Jax!"

"What are you talking about Babe?" Staring at her as if she's lost her mind, her runs a soothing hand along her head again, thinking she might have hit it too hard.

"That Irishmen I patched up about a week ago, he took Abel, something about a son for a son. Jax we have to get him, we have to get to him before it's too late!

Quickly jumping up from the floor, Jax searches Abel's crib thinking that maybe she's disoriented from taking a blow to the head, and Abel's just sleeping in his crib. Realizing she's telling the truth and Abel's not in his crib, he turns to look at her. A combination of rage and horror replacing the look of worry that had been all over his face a moment ago.

"We have to go get him Jax!" She tries to pull herself up off the floor, but the pounding in her head causes to fall back. Jax catches her just as she is about to hit the floor. Worry crosses his face once more as he guides her into the rocking chair.

"Chibs" he yells to the guys in the Kitchen no doubt. A second later Chibs appears at the door. "Stay here with Tara, and call her an ambulance she needs to have her head looked at."

"Jax…" she starts to plead but he shuts her down quickly.

"No Babe. Chibs is going to take you to the hospital. I need to know your head is ok, and that you're safe."

"But Abel…."

"I will find Abel and I will bring him home." She sees the promise in his eyes, looking down she quietly nods her head in agreement. He kisses her head quickly and then he's gone.

45 minutes later she's sitting in a room at St. Thomas, staring blankly at the wall ahead, and thinking about every single possible scenario that's happening with her boys right now. She still hasn't heard anything from Jax. She knows that can't be good. Jax would have called her the minute he got Abel back, and let her know that he was safe. Something must have gone wrong. She needs to find Jax, needs to know what is going on. She's just about to jump off the table and find out when the doctor walks in.

"Alright Tara I got the test results back from the CAT scan and everything looks good."

"Thank you. Does that mean I'm free to go", she asks jumping down from the table, she needs to get out of here. She needs to find her family.

"Just one minute." She looks at her cautiously. "While going over your chart, I noticed you hand some blood work done a couple days ago."

Leaning back on the table she just jumped down from, her heart starts beating erratically. She had completely forgotten about the blood work she had done earlier in the week, to confirm her suspicions.

"I'm pregnant." she blurts out. She didn't need her to tell her, somewhere deep inside she already knew, she's known since before she had the bloodwork done. It was the only thing that made sense. That could be the only explanation for everything. Why her emotions had been all over the place, her need to be close to Jax all the time, and why she couldn't jump in front of the knife to protect Abel. Not only was she afraid of having the same knife that had killed sack plunged into his little body, but she couldn't choose between her two children. The fear of something happening to her unborn child caused her to let something terrible happen to her son.

"Tara." She says slowly, pulling her away from her thoughts. "I can do an ultra sound today, to see if everything is progressing the way it should be, and make sure there was no damage from you falling and hitting your head.

"I guess you better."

"Alright just lay back real quick for me, and I'll get started."

Hopping back onto the table she was leaning against she lay back and lifted up her shirt.

"This is probably going to be a little cold," she tells her as she pours a generous amount onto her exposed skin.

"Alright let's just have a look here."

She searches the screen for the heart beat as the doctor moves the wand around her stomach. She hears it before she actually sees it. The thumping of her baby's heart is like a sweet lullaby to her ears, soothing her aching heart for a second. But then grief, anger, and regret creep in taking over again. All of the feelings about Abel's kidnapping start to consume her. The anger she has towards herself for not saving him, for not jumping in front of that knife, or finding a way to beat the shit out of that Irishmen until he was lying cold on the floor, torture her mind. She suddenly feels as though she has no right to have this tiny life growing inside of her, she has no right to be a mother again. Tears burn at the corners of her eyes, and before she has the chance to swipe them away, they start running down her cheeks.

"Awe don't cry honey, the baby's fine, looks strong and healthy, no harm done."

If she knew the reason why she was crying, she would not be trying to comfort her. She would be doing the same thing she is. She would be questioning her ability to be a mother. But she doesn't know, and she doesn't have the heart to say it out loud yet. Not until she knows for sure, what's happening with Abel, although in her heart she thinks she already knows.

"Thank you Lauren" she whisper as she hands her the sonogram picture. She pulls her shirt down, and tucks the picture into her pocket, without looking at it. Her head is still pounding when she gets up off the table.

Walking into the waiting room Opie is now sitting with Chibs. When they see her walking towards them, they both stand up, and that's when she knows. They don't even have to say it, it's in their eyes. Opie's looking at her in the way that only Opie can. Those green eyes boring into her soul. It's the way he used to look at her when he would pick her up from her house, after her dad had one of his drunken fits. It's always the same look that says

"You poor little thing, I don't know what to say that's going to make this better, I don't know how to help you."

Then she looks over to Chibs, his eyes pretty much mirroring Opie's. And all she can do is put her head down and cry.

Opie walks over to her and wraps his arms around her.

"I'm so sorry." Is all he says. He doesn't have to tell her because she already knows. Saying the words out loud, would just cause her to crumble even more.

He doesn't promise her that they will find him. He doesn't tell her it will be ok. He just holds her as she breaks down. That's one of the things she's always loved about Opie. His ability to cut through the bullshit, and either tell like it is, or not say anything at all.

After a couple of minutes of her sobbing into his chest he speaks.

"Jax wants me to take you to the clubhouse." Letting go of her slightly and dropping his head to meet her gaze. "He needs to know you're safe, and the club thinks that for now, the clubhouse is our safest option. We'll all be there watching you." She doesn't need to ask where Jax is, she already knows, he's gone to talk to Hale. He's probably screaming, and pleading with him to help him find their baby boy. While she understands why he's doing it, a part of her wishes it was him who had been waiting for her. All she wants is for him to hold her right now.

She lifts her head to look at Op and just nods her head, letting him lead her out of the hospital. Letting Chibs squeeze her shoulder as they come up next to him. It's meant to be comforting, but right now it does nothing for her.

When they walk into the Clubhouse it's pretty quiet, the chapel doors are shut, and she knows the club is in there trying to figure out how to handle the situation. Chibs kisses the side of her head, and then walks toward the large double doors, as Opie comes to stand in front of her.

"Do you need anything?"

She tries to fight back the tears. It feels like they've already decided that he's gone and there is no getting him back.

"Jax." She says stepping around him walking to the back apartment.

Shutting the door behind her, she leans her pounding head against it. Just standing there for a couple minutes with her eyes closed, praying to whatever god there may be that they help her find her little boy, and make this pain in her heart go away.

Moving from the door and sliding onto the bed she leans her aching body against the pillows, and stares at the ceiling above her.

He was gone.

Her baby boy was gone.

AN: Ok so I'm not a professional writer, so bear with me. I am just doing this for fun, and to help me get through season 7. Feel free to leave feedback, I would love to hear what you think :)


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